Properties that
didn't make the
A-list.
But should have.
For SaleHow Long Can One House Be, Keiraville?
The pool room is so big it needs a sign to the toilets.
The Ones You Lot Can't Stop Gawking At
Ranked by sheer volume of people who should have been working.
SoldFrom Doilies to Sex Panther in Croydon
Twenty years ago this house had doilies. Then something happened to it.
For SaleNo Corners to Hide In: The Minchinbury Round House
The agent wrote 700 words about this house. Not one of them was "round".
For SaleOxley Built a Booth Into the Kitchen
Boiling an egg? Take a seat. The kitchen has a booth.
For SaleIpswich's Biggest Antique Has a Letterbox
It comes fully furnished. Please do not touch anything. Ever.
For SaleStirling's Lounge Room Is a Par Three
Is it a carpet, or a putting green that went a little too far?
For saleMount Macedon's Castle-Adjacent Party House
Not a castle. Castle adjacent. The stairs on the outside go to the roof.
For SaleWarners Bay Has a Cave and Nobody Will Say Why
IT'S GOT A CAVE.
Not for saleGreenwith's Red Heart Tub Has Seen Things
There's a red heart-shaped spa in the bedroom. No door. No wall.
SoldRenovate This, Go to Jail: Newstead's Time Capsule
The agent says it has incredible potential. How dare you.
For saleCharge Admission: Balwyn North's Art Deco Museum
One lawn ornament short of needing a ticket booth.
SoldThe Blue Carpet Cannot Be Ignored: Daylesford
The blue carpet cannot be ignored. We tried.
For saleChurch? TAFE? Cult HQ? Shepparton Weighs In
Church, TAFE or cult HQ? Shepparton is still deciding.
SoldHolland House: Middle Cove's Glass Menagerie
Some houses have a feature wall. This one skipped walls altogether.
SoldKentucky Blue and Not One Day Younger: Lambton's Time Capsule
Finished in 1978. Everyone agreed never to speak of it again.
Pick Your Poison
For SaleThree Flights Up And Zero Regrets: Collingwood's Cardio Loft
Photographs like a Berlin gallery. Lives like a fire drill. No lift.
SoldHonestly, Who Hurt You?: Bruce Rock's Pyramid House
Someone built a pyramid in the wheatbelt. Then they built it a garage.
SoldIt's Red. It's Very Red.: Nowra's Boogie Nights House
It's red. Not striking red. Just red.
For SaleDo Not Touch This House: Lane Cove Edition
Fifty years, one family, zero renovations. Do not touch it.
Not currently for saleFlintstones Meets The Jetsons: Newport's Clay House
A grade 2 student drew their dream house. Somebody built it.
Not currently for saleYes, Another Indoor Pool: Welcome To St Ives
The second house we've found with a lap pool in the lounge. We're worried.
Not currently for saleWho Did This?: Paradise Point's Full Gold Treatment
Who did this? We need a name.
Sold. Gone. Never Forgotten.
Somebody actually bought these. We're still processing it.
SoldAnything But Greige: Faulconbridge's Retro Fever Dream
Takes greige as a personal insult. We lost count of the starburst clocks.
Not for saleThe 24,000-Square-Foot House With Its Own Old West Town Inside It
It has a Western town built inside it. The rest is a formality.
Not for saleThe House That Bloomed Too Much
Normal brick house outside. Every doily in New South Wales inside.
For SaleShe Left And Never Came Back
She left five furnished bedrooms and a teddy bear behind. We have questions.
For SaleThe Trouse Of Sarsfield
A retired Frankston line train, now living its best life in the bush.
For SaleThe Theatre Royal, Lithgow
It's been a cinema, a boxing ring and a nightclub. Now it's a listing.
For SaleFort Knox, But Damp
A double-brick castle with a lap pool where the middle should be.
Let Fate Pick The House.
Not currently for saleMoon Base Karalee
You enter through a tunnel. It gets less normal from there.
Under ContractThe House That Started At The Bar
The bar came first. The house was designed backwards from it.
SoldThe House The Jungle Ate
The garden won this fight years ago.
SoldThe Round Disco House
Somebody built a house for roller skating. Mirror ball included.
For saleThe Long Way Home: Elevated Plains
110 metres long, and the indoor garden needs watering daily. Like it or not.
SoldStudio 54: Kenthurst
A working nightclub. Also five acres and a cricket wicket.
SoldThe Toilet's Right There: Glebe
Award-winning architecture. No door on the ensuite. None.
For SaleThe Chouse Of Greendale
An 1849 church with a pipe organ in the living room.
SoldAre These Homeowners Doomsday Preppers?
Floodlights, cameras, a battery bank and backup houses. Expecting something?
Not for saleJesus Take The Wheel: Oran Park
There's a life-size Jesus in the main bedroom. Every dinner is a Last Supper.
Not for saleThe Cannon-Ball Estate
An indoor rock pool with a waterfall. And wagon wheel furniture.
SoldSave Moonya: Burwood's Stained-Glass Time Capsule
A developer wants to knock her down for something beige. We riot at dawn.
Not currently for saleGidget Goes to Palm Springs
Two bars, a yellow water slide and brolgas on the kitchen walls.
Not currently for saleThe Randwick Royale
A blue bathroom and a rust bathroom, fighting for supremacy.
For SaleValley Of The Dolls
Two rooms of dolls, floor to ceiling. So many eyes.
SoldThe F.A.C. Manor: Beverly Hills, NSW (Not That One)
Beverly Hills, NSW. Not that one. Very much not that one.
For SaleLion Around: Geelong's Lion-Statue Mansion
Fourteen lions. We counted. Then we found the cellar window into the pool.
SoldThe 3.4 Metre Wonder
3.4 metres wide. The bath is in the side passage.
Not currently for saleKnights of the Yellow Kitchen Table
A Crusader meeting room with a round table. Then there's the theatre.
SoldWA's Retro Wonder
A matador mural behind the bar. Half an acre of teal-and-gold carpet.
SoldPOV: It's 1975 and You Just Got Home
The listing mentions Yiayia, Nonna and Pappous before the floor plan.
SoldStep Into 1980: Jamboree Heights' Wallpaper Wonderland
Untouched since the Hawke government, and the study is gold shag pile.
SoldSix Ensuites and a Climbing Wall
Six ensuites, and one bedroom has its own climbing wall.
Not currently for salePretty in Pink: Nambucca Heads' Daggiest Beach Pad
Three bedrooms, three colour philosophies, none of them white.
Not currently for saleThe Earth Castle
It has working drawbridges. That's not even the weirdest part.
For SaleWhat Was I Thinking?: Port Lincoln's Gold-And-Marble Fever Dream
Two houses stacked on top of each other, joined by a golden nude.
For saleBaltimore: The Gold Coast's Only Home Casino
There's a casino in this house. A real one.
SoldQuambone Castle: A Fixer-Upper With Delusions of Grandeur
The pool is brown. The walls are mouldy. But it's got a helipad.
For SaleThis House Comes With A Bonus Western Town
Normal house out front. A whole Wild West town out back, brothel included.
SoldThe Sandcastle House
She wanted a castle. The builders, the council and her architect dad all lost.
SoldThe Time Machine On Park Street
The red leather bar is still waiting for guests who stopped coming decades ago.
Not currently for saleSydney's Pink Palace
A Harry Seidler tower, and a tin of pink paint that got loose.
SoldOne Conversation Pit Short Of Perfect
Coral velvet, orange florals, a red damask powder room. Nobody touched a thing.
SoldLiving In Freakin' Disney World
A Millennium Falcon cinema and a dragon pizza oven. Inside Disney World.
SoldIvy League: Darling Point
Sold for $21 million. Still has a rooster portrait in the dining room.
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We're always hunting for the next one — avocado bathrooms, pebblecrete, carpet that's seen things. Seen one? Tip us off. Want the daily finds? Follow along on Instagram.